The Author’s Journey with Her Dog in Spain
In 2023, I embarked on an unforgettable journey across Spain, accompanied by my loyal canine companion. This trip marked a significant chapter in my life, transitioning from a turbulent experience in the United States to embracing a new beginning overseas.
A Turning Point in June 2020
The pivotal realization that I no longer wanted to continue living in the United States came to me in June 2020. While sheltering in my parents’ guest bedroom during the pandemic, I found myself grappling with emotional turmoil as protests erupted across the country following the tragic murder of George Floyd. The nation appeared divided, with many passionately defending harmful ideologies while others sought justice and equality.
The Weight of Social Injustice
Witnessing the stark social injustice unfold around me deepened my discontent. On a rare grocery run, I encountered a group of children protesting Floyd’s murder. Their innocence contrasted sharply with the indifference displayed by the adults around them. I felt an overwhelming urge to support their causes, and after voicing my solidarity, I pulled over to cry, unable to handle the weight of the moment.
Deciding to Leave
Three months later, I took the bold step of boarding a one-way flight to Spain with my dog and the few possessions I could fit into two suitcases. I was ready to escape from a life that seemed increasingly hostile toward women and marginalized communities. The world I knew felt suffocating, and I longed for a place where basic human rights were not a constant battleground.
The Guilt of Privilege
However, as soon as I settled into my new surroundings, a nagging guilt consumed me. I recognized my fortune in having an EU passport and the financial resources to relocate, unlike countless women back home who shared my frustrations but had no viable paths to freedom. My privilege weighed heavily on me, especially in light of the myriad injustices unfolding back in the U.S.
Reflecting on the 2020 Election
When Donald Trump lost the election in November 2020, one might have expected relief. Yet, as a survivor of sexual assault, I was troubled by the fact that nearly half the nation had supported a man with numerous allegations against him. The societal divide regarding women’s rights and autonomy felt more pronounced than ever.
Autonomy in Spain
My experience as a woman in Spain provided me with an autonomy that had felt elusive in the U.S. Here, I could easily access birth control over the counter for a mere few dollars, and essential gynecological care was free and widely available. The contrast was stark, and it filled me with dismay to think about the restrictions imposed on American women.
The Impact of Roe v. Wade’s Reversal
The reversal of Roe v. Wade deeply affected me; my heart went out to American women facing a regressive reality. My previous struggles to access reproductive healthcare made me acutely aware of the hurdles that women would have to face. I recalled my own harrowing experiences, and the thought of future generations grappling with similar challenges filled me with dread.
Hope Amidst Despair
Despite the grim atmosphere in the U.S. following Roe v. Wade’s overturning, I hoped the country would rally for the rights of women. International conversations echoed this sentiment. Polls showed low support for Trump in various countries, suggesting a worldwide condemnation of his policies.
Disappointment in American Sentiment
To my dismay, I found many American women reaffirming their support for the very administration that sought to undermine their rights. Conversations with friends revealed a lack of awareness and solidarity, leaving me questioning how such perspectives could persist amidst evidence of oppression.
The Struggle for Understanding
Conversations about female empowerment and reproductive rights often seem to bypass those who have endured trauma. While some cling to faith-based teachings, those experiences cannot replace the need for tangible support and understanding during crises. It appeared that many were unwilling to widen their understanding beyond their personal experiences.
Feeling Alienated from Home
After years of living abroad, returning to America felt increasingly alienating. I was plagued with anxiety over the healthcare system, fearing potential accidents or medical emergencies that could deplete my finances. The contrast between my life in Spain and my experiences back home was startling and often left me uneasy.
The Weight of American Citizenship
Each glance at my American passport served as a reminder of a government whose priorities did not align with my well-being. The realization that I may remain tied to a system that could ultimately disregard my life weighed heavily on me. The thought of renouncing my citizenship beckoned, although it came with the loss of familial connections.
Global Implications of U.S. Politics
The implications of the 2024 election extend far beyond U.S. borders, impacting the life I had started anew in Spain. With far-right movements gaining traction across Europe, I worried about the potential repercussions on reproductive rights and societal progress. The winds of nationalism threatened not just the European Union but global stability.
A Shared Concern
Friends from conflict zones questioned why the U.S. seemed apathetic to their struggles, feeling abandoned as the world shifted towards authoritarianism. I found myself at a loss for answers, aware of the challenges ahead for so many individuals and communities worldwide.
Facing the Future
Four years after my departure, I find myself confronted with the same sociopolitical crises that drove me to leave initially. The environment may have changed, but the underlying realities remained. As I navigate my life in Spain, I am acutely aware that I cannot escape the implications of a divisive American political landscape.
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